iTunes Top 50 40-36

40. Lean Like a Cholo -Down


PAS: Lou Dobbs was right, we now have Mexicans coming in stealing novelty dance rap tunes from hardworking American Black Folks. Mentirosa was one thing, but these are Itunes downloads which should rightfully be going to DJ Unk.


TKG: I think Mello Man Ace was Cuban. Lou Dobbs has no problem with the Cubans. And I imagine Kid Frost's La Raza would've caused Dobbs plenty of Hispanic Panic. How did this get this high? I mean I realize that Clinton Sparks thinks " Being a lyricist doesn't matter anymore" . But not only does Down not have the lyrical flow of Chingo Bling. He doesn't have his beats either.

39. The Sweet Escape-Gwen Stefani


TKG: Can Akon do no wrong? Can he save everything? As a rule I don't like Gwen Stefani tunes. I mean I can't think of a single one that I actively enjoy. This I like. I mean I watched the Rodney Bigenheimer documentary and know that she was raised on Rodney on the ROQ. And this really has all the L.A. mod celebrates catchy L.A. popcraft that you want, hints of L.A. glam and L.A. girl group combined with New Wave singer doing fake West Indian lilt. And it all combines together smoothly. The really commercial production and Akon doing his signature not a yodel chest to head voice shift thing put it over the top. Really if the world has to have a Gwen Steffani, this is the type of thing she should be doing.


PAS; Yeah this was shockingly inoffensive, I really liked the video game sounds and the Akon stuff was completely great. Usually Gwen Stefani can take a producer I like and lead them to their worst impulses. Akon can work with anyone apparently, although he really should have saved this beat for T-Pain.

38. Lost In This Moment -Big & Rich


PAS: What makes this Country music? Is the rule now, Southern accent=country? Because this was indistinguishable from a 70's MOR adult contemporary ballad. If James Taylor was from Kentucky would he be considered country music?


TKG: Holy shit this stinks. Listening to it, it was clear that this was written for the purpose of being a first dance wedding song. I'd like to believe that Kelly Clarkson's "A Moment Like This" was written as a romantic song. Just happens to be that it works as a first wedding dance song. Phil Collin's "Against All Odds" was written as a romantic song. Just happens to be that it works as a first wedding dance song. Big and Rich can't be bothered to do all that. So they just write a song for the purpose of marketing it as a wedding dance song. It's really craven. Marketing executive came up to them and said "you should write a first wedding dance song, make sure that it has one slide guitar riff to give it a sentimental country feel, and remember you're writing for arrhythmic white folks, so make sure the spots where you dip your partner are really obvious. The notes need to sustained long enough to dip even he fattest country fan." Song doesn't work in any context but a first wedding dance. Well maybe you could use it for the parents of the brides dance too.


37. Working Class Hero-Green Day


TKG: Green Day covering John Lennon really exposes the jejuneness of John Lennon. You listen to this and go damn Billy Joe Armstrong would never write a couplet as shitty as "They hit you at home and hit you at school/they hated your clever and despise the fool". You listen to this and go "Never realized that Billie Joe Armstrong is really insightful when he writes about class struggle". But you listen to him covering Lennon and suddenly Armstrong originals become Bertold Brecht in comparison. "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" suddenly feels like something written by Foucalt.


PAS: Green Day covering John Lennon may be the true tragedy in the Darfur genocide. Damn you Omar al Bashir.

36. The Way I Are-Timbaland featuring Keri Hilson & D.O.E.


PAS: Man what the fuck happened to Timbaland? Was all of his talent in his fat? This, much like every song I have heard on his album is atrocious. Man, maybe Scott Storch was the brains behind the whole operation. This almost feels equivalent to Stevie Wonder's 80's post drug artistic collapse. I guess hoagies were his heroin.


TKG: This is really bad. I normally really like arcade game beats. But this is just shitty. Sounds like the Mortal Kombat theme mixed with a eighties teen comedy electro funk track. Not from a good eighties teen comedy either. Not a John Hughes movie but like the really derivative fake Yello that would play in "Hamburger Academy" or something. The singing and rapping feels really dated too. Did they make a sequel to "JoyStick"? "Joystick II: the Track Ball Controller" ? This should've been on the soundtrack.