Itunes Top 50 11/18/06 20-16

20. Nelly Furtado- Maneater

TKG: Bone Machine covering Hall and Oates is a neat idea. But Furtado really doesn't have Tom Waits vocal range. I also think Waits would have better taste. He would know to cover "She's out of touch" or "Method of Modern Love". Bone Machine chanting along to the spelling parts of "Method of Modern Love" would be really haunting and great. This isn't.

PAS: The cover songs on this project have been pretty rough. Is this Timbaland? Man has there been some disappointing Timbaland tracks on this countdown. Is Timbaland losing all the weight and getting body sculpted the functional equivalent of Eric Clapton or Stevie Wonder getting off drugs?

19. Nickelback- Far Away

TKG: This really feels like the middle part of a power ballad as you're building to the rock out part. But instead of rocking out it segues into another boring middle part. Like the verse two couplets before Tesla shouts that "love is all around you" followed by the verse two couplets before Nightranger shout about "Motoring". It's like Nickelback keep on teasing that they're going shout "Motorin'" but it's all a tease until this becomes what would happen if Tesla were inspired by " Music for Airports". I'm giving this too much credit. This isn't nearly as cool as Tesla covering "Music for Airports".

PAS: This would actually make a good prom song, as it is the aural equivalent of the unsatisfying post-prom parking lot handjob. You keep thinking you are going to rock out, but nothing.

18. JoJo- Too Little, Too Late

PAS: So Tom and I were discussing the possible racial backround of JoJo, as we were trying to categorize this shockingly dull tune. I thought JoJo might be Black but Tom correctly identified her as a white girl trying to sing Black. It turns out that she was a vocal prodigy who was discovered by Bill Cosby and Oprah and now does supporting rolls in Robin Williams movies. Which makes her really anemic Star Searchish vocal gesticulating even funnier. Is this a prank by Oprah and Cosby? Are they trying to prove that white folks will embrace any caucasized version of black music no matter how obviously bad it is?

TKG: No this is not the Hailey brother. So this tune started up and first thought was is this an amazingly mediocre R&B tune or is this a weird country tune where Leanne Rimes is trying to imitate some Black Gospel tune her momma loves. I'm not a big fan of slick Babyface ballads. And not a fan of the Mariah, Whitney big over the top affected Broadway style singing. But well they have the chops to pull those things off. You could have replaced Jojo's melismas with Keith Urban's yodel and this would have seemed less discount. Even more boring than "Far Away"

17. Carrie Underwood- Before He Cheats

TKG: This actually may be the best modern country tune we've heard thus far. Maybe it just sounds great next to the dullness of Nickelback and Jojo. Unlike Nickelback when Underwood sets up for a rockin' out part she actually rocks out. For angry girl country this isn't as good as The Dixie Chicks stuff, but there are enough fun Alana Myles parts for me to dig. Listening to this couldn't help but fantasize about Underwood and Danita Kane getting into a fight outside a bar. Don't fuck with Kane's car.

PAS: I really liked the three opening couplets. All three open with "Right Now" and she does a real nice job describing the other woman, pointing out her flaws and contrasting them with Underwood's strength. "He's probably buying her some fruity little drink, cause she can't shoot whisky" In contrast one can assume that Underwood can shoot whisky and thus is superior. That is why we applaud the destruction of his 4x4. I think without the opening establishment sections, she just comes off like a vandal. Good solid songwriting.

16. Ludacris- Money Maker

PAS: This is pretty great, Ludacris at his best is as good as anyone. This isn't Ludacris at his best, but it is solidly B+ Ludacris.A couple of places he does inter-verse rhymes, and multiple word rhymes, which are pretty nifty tricks. I loved the orchestral opening, and the backround organ. Grew Up a Screw Up which is the second single is such a better song, that this is hurt a bit, but this is a really great rap song.

TKG: Ludacris can rap this well in his sleep. This does really feel like a lazy Pharrell beat. And I think it holds the tune back. I thought the Shondrae/Kelis tune really didn't work either. I never thought it worked when Babyface produced Janet or when Jam and Lewis produced Whitney. This isn't a failure on the level of those collaborations, nor does it have the creepy wife swapping feel. Still it really feels like Pharrell is holding Luda back. In 2004 hip hop was all about Lil Jon doing this modernized Hank Shoklee really dense production, while the Neptunes were all about modernized Showbiz and A.G./Freddie Foxxx spare beats that emphasized open spaces. It's 2006 and Nitty and Rick Rock have mastered non-dense production. Really doesn't feel like Pharrell should be this lazy with fucking Luda. I mean Nitty wouldn't half ass it if given the chance to work with Luda.

Itunes Top 50 11/18/06 25-21

25. Jibbs- Chain Hang Low

PAS: Much like DJ Unk, this is a song that you figure will be really great when the remix drops. Jibbs is a better rapper then Unk or Young Joc. Almost to the point that I am kind of looking forward to Jibbs dropping verses on other peoples good beats.

TKG: So earlier I was writing about 2006 being the year of Snap and Hyphy. Escapism not being attached to romanticized stories of gangsterism or claims to richness but instead based on just the adult decision to act "dumb". One could try to make a sociological point about how St. Louis and Harlem's response to this development has been infantilism and using camp song/double dutch songs. These are places where adults can't escape through being silly...are unwilling to escape through being stupid. Sillyness is only the provence of youth. I guess you could make that claim. I really don't have anywhere near the skills to argue that point but it amuses me to put it out there. I really like The Puppies "Hokey Pokey" and "B.I.N.G.O."...both really are 90's Bass classics. I'd go as far as to claim that both Puppies full length albums are pretty much as good as 90s Bass albums go. I mean they didn't have the lyrical sophistication of the Splakk Pack but they didn't have the filler tracks either. For song built around children chanting I don't think Chain Hang Low will hold up as well as the Puppies...but I blame the St. Louis production.

24. Justin Timberlake- SexyBack

PAS: This is actually probably my least favorite of the tunes on this really good album (I think All Over Again may be a crappier song, but I really grew up on Jodeci, so fake Jodeci appeals to me.) I can see why it was a single, as it is really danceable, and I can't exactly describe what I don't like about it, but it just kind of bugs me. The entire premise of bringing "sexy" back is pretty preposterous. Like our puritanical society needs Justin to return us to the bygone days of sexy.

TKG: I like SexyBack. Like it a lot. About a year or so ago, Huey Freeman called Timberlake, Omarion, Usher and some other folks to remind them that Michael Jackson was a singer and not an actual genre. Unlike the other victims of Huey's calls, Timberlake hasn't taken Jackson as a genre. Instead his genre seems to be 1982-1983 pop R&B. While Justifide really was built on him studying Michael Jackson, his second album is about really studying Prince. I'm hoping that his next one will be built on studying Chaka Khan and not Hall and Oates. As going from Off the Wall to 1999 to H2O would be sad.

23. Bow Wow Featuring Chris Brown and Johnta Austin- Shortie Like Mine

TKG: Ok you listen to this and you're left even more impressed with Brad Paisley's craftsmanship. The conceit of this kind of a " I love my girlfriend" tune is that it's about a "specific" girl. Its not a tune about loving all bitches. It's about being an actual romantic who cares about a specific real individual woman. Female listener hears this, buys the authenticity of the woman and goes " I wish I could be his girlfriend". There is nothing here that makes me believe that this song is being addressed to an actual woman. Nothing in the Chris Brown sung parts that make it sound like a "specific " girl. And the Bow Wow parts are even more generalized. Rap is all about details. It's not enough to say "nice car", rappers will tell you about the details of the stitching on the seat covers. Details make you believe in the expertise of the narrator. Bow Wow provides no details. "Cute Face, nice size"...real general. What does that mean? I mean I know what the Leaders of the New School think is a nice size because Busta explains that "there are lots of type of fat" and exactly which one appeals to him. I know Project Pat likes legs like rhinos and labia that look like a a moose's mouth. What's nice size for Bow Wow? He used to be Lil' Bow Wow, can he handle a moose's mouth?...Would that be the wrong size for him? Bow Wow gives me no details and I'm left thinking he's an unreliable narrator. I don't think he really has a girlfriend. This song fails.

PAS: Is it possible that Bow Wow has been as famous as long as he has without ever actually getting any tang? This song is describing his "Canadian" girlfriend. I almost feel like asking him if the pussy goes vertical or horizontal.

22. Jim Jones- We Fly High

PAS: I DJ Karaoke and I had a couple of Filipino guys yelling "Baalllinnn" over some GW Sorority girls attempt at "Only the Good Die Young." I felt like yelling back "I don't accept you guys rapping. Here I'll let you DJ, you can scratch up this tune, either that or do a pop lock." I am glad Jim Jones isn't more popular among the whites, as Dave Chappelle really ruined about six months of work.

TKG: I try to exclusively date women with some access to meds. Week after Camron got shot at H2O, I was out drinking with a bunch of hardened Howard nurses who were bitching about how much he screamed: "there was six year old with a bullet in her belly...guts hanging out. She didn't scream. but Camron gets a surface wound and it's a hot mess.". Supposedly he spent most of the night in the hospital yelling at his entourage for leaving him out to dry. I tried to figure out who that entourage consisted of. "Who was he shouting for? Was he yelling at Freaky Zeeke?" ""Sheist Bub?", "JR Writer?" "Who?" BAAL-LIN!

21. Michael Andrews- Mad World

PAS: A smarter man then me could write an entire "Tipping Point", "Long Tail" pop sociology book about a Tears for Fears cover from a five year old indy film soundtrack, ending up as a top 25 Itunes song due to an appearance in a video game commercial. Feels like that must personify something about 21 century culture that could be catch phrased into something that you could give corporate marketing speeches about. All I need is a catch phrase.

TKG: I guess the word would be "auxiliary". As really this exposes some of the silliness of the whole project. We no longer have a Top 40 pop music culture. The music that makes up the collective unconscious is music distributed as auxiliary item... Putumayo soundtracks for hemp bracelet stores, Starbucks exclusive tracks, Evanascence tunes for montages at the end of teen dramas, video game commercials, etc. Music labels are no longer built around making music. Music making is auxiliary product for labels that sell other things. Not sure wether music industry represents the future of all art distribution..Who knows. My big question is does this Andrews guy do any Human League covers? Cause "Being Boiled" would be really great on solo piano.

Itunes Top 50 11/18/06 30-26

30. Evanescence- Call Me When You're Sober

PAS: Evanescence does a thing that I don't particularly care for, but unlike a lot of music I don't like, I think I can differentiate between good and bad Evanescence. This feels like kind of a throwaway Evanescence track. Like any cutting done to this song would be desultory rather then enthusiastic.

TKG: So Phil goes looking for this tune on Limewire. their record label has put up a bunch of fake links to prevent us from downloading it for free. Phil realizes that their fans probably can't spell and so looks up Evenescence and we get it immediately. I understand the construct that Brad Paisley is working with. He sings a song where he portrays a really needy demanding girlfriend....the kind of woman that even other women would go...shit how does anyone put up with that. And then he talks about how much he is devoted to her. this should elicit response of "aww what a great guy". That construct makes sense."Don't cry to me, if you'd love me you'd be here with me" ? Huh? I don't get this construct. She's describing a needy girl who won't put up with her boyfriends drinking? This is supposed to appeal to boys that don't drink and want to rescue her from her relationship? They make songs to appeal to those losers now? Don't those guys still collect limited edition power pop singles?

29. Rascal Flatts- Life Is a Highway

PAS: The Tom Cochran original is really not a good song, but this is so much worse, that it's shittiness actually elevates the original. The twang here is ridiculously fake sounding. It actually kind of sounds like Bruce Bruce imitating a redneck.

TKG: Fu-uck. fifteen years from now I imagine some fucker is going to try to country up "Ants Marching" and I'll be left nostalgic for this. It's not just that the vocal twang feels Def Comedy fake, but the guitar twang sounds like a parody too. Can't someone expose Flatts mom as a Tunisian Jew?

28. Chris Brown- Say Goodbye

PAS: There are parts of this when Chris Brown was attempting to do almost an Akon voice, and he is not Akon. There is also a section where he is trying to sing really fast like Crazy Bone, he isn't Crazy Bone either.

TKG: On some level this whole project has been a failure. As both me and Phil kind have been speaking with the same voice. We're guys who disagree on pop music. He likes Gnarls Barkley's Crazy alot more than I do. Crazy really feels to me to be a really obvious attempt at a Seal/Bill Withers mash up. and really isn't as interesting (doesn't have the friction) of an actual Seal/Bill Withers mash up. Crazy feels like something that would sound fine in Chipolte. I like Unk's -"Walk it Out" a lot more than Phil. I really like that it's just a DJ who figured out a couple neat loops and beats and threw some DJ patter on top of it. It's kind of a throw back to the origins of rap, capturing the spirit better than Jurrasic 5 would ever be able to. It's underdeveloped-ness is endearing. Phil thinks its underdeveloped and needs a better rapper on remix. We really haven't done a good job articulating the differences in our musical opinions. I've heard "Say Goodbye" a million times and never much cared for it. Hearing it after Lady Sovereign, Pussycat Dolls, Rascall Falatts , etc...and I think I have a new appreciation of the tune. It is sub- Celebrity N'Synch. But I I kind of like Brown's attempt at fake Akon sustain, and fake Crazy Bone stutter speed as it feels like it really does nice job laying out the outline for OG RON C to remix this on a F*ck Action CD..

27. The Killers- When You Were Young

TKG: Amusing to listen to guys who started as fake New Order doing fake R.E.M. I never really liked R.E.M.. But for bubblegum R.E.M "he doesn''t look a thing like Jesus/ but he talks like a gentleman/like you imagine when" may be better than anything Michael Stipe ever wrote. "They say the devil's water it ain't so sweet"... that's fucking "Daydream Believer" great.

PAS: Your basic music reviewer shorthand for this new Killers album was that they were doing Bruce Springsteen shtick. I agree with Tom that it sounds way more like R.E.M. then Bruce Springsteen. I liked the first Killers album a fair amount more then I liked this album on first listen. However this single may be better then Mr. Brightside, and kind of makes me want to re-listen to the whole album again, something I imagine I would do if Hell Hath No Fury wasn't coming out on Tuesday.

26. KT Tunstall- Suddenly I See

PAS: In a world where you have Sheryl Crow and Bonnie Raitt, I see no reason to have a Scottish Sheryl Raitt with a much flatter voice.

TKG: I hang out in Irish bars. There always is some band playing Charlie on the MTA telling me I can buy their CD. I'm shit faced drunk and willing to drop cash on anything. Still have never been suckered into buying a CD. Apparently some A &R guy can't hold his drinks as well as I can.

Itunes Top 50 11/18/06 40-31

40. Fergie- London Bridge

PAS: This is godawful for the most part, but I did kind like the horn stuff. It is kind of amusing production as they just throw three dozen things against the wall, and kind of come off with a nice horn. Only in England can a meth head become a sex symbol, I guess they just don't notice the teeth.

TKG: This is painful. I think there are a couple lines about scat in there somewhere which is always a good thing for a pop tune. I've heard this a million times before but this was the first time I heard the tinny horn blats. Fergie's attempts to sound like MIA are less convincing than Billy Childish's attempts to sound like Bo Diddley.

39. Augustana- Boston

TKG: I misread this and thought there actually was a band named Amanda ballsy enough to name their single Boston. I like the Shroeder piano. The lyrics and chorus won't make me forget Dave Loggins.

PAS: I really like the opening piano stuff, kind of reminded me of the Piano Man from Digital Underground, if he grew up in Berkeley instead of Oakland. There is really very little about this song I like besides the Piano.

38. The Game- Let's Ride

PAS: My old roommate briefly dated the ex-girlfriend of Ben Gibbard during the period he was writing multiple albums under multiple bands about their relationship collapsing. I wonder if Dr. Dre's new boyfriend feels as awkward about this album as my buddy felt about that.

TKG: Really? Is the Game's whole new album a breakup song? The Game built his first album around a bunch of hip-hop rewrites of "We Didn't Start the Fire". His second one will be reinterpretations of "And So it Goes"...? Here's hoping the Game never discovers "Goodnight Saigon". Someone needs to tell 50 Cent that he isn't Nate Dogg and no one wants to listen to him sing hooks. Game's fake 50 Cent as budget Nate Dogg is awful. I mean the one thing you can say about Billy Joel is he understood hooks.

37. Birdman & Lil' Wayne- Stuntin' Like My Daddy

TKG: This is the first tune on this list that I actively like and listen to regularly. But it's 2006. On some level the Cash Money/Bad Boy escapism through buying expensive motorcycles feels dated. In 2006 escapism is built on the choice to shake your head and "act stupid, dumb, dumb, dumb". You don't need fancy Yamaha's. It's 2006 for escapism you don't need product, "You can do it all by yourself". Still Lil Weezy can make the odes to the James Bond lifestyle work. It helps that he feels like he was raised in it. I always liked Birdman and Mannie Fresh as they seemed to know that they weren't really lyricists, and never tried to be. Just two guys slinging game than actual rap lyrics. It was endearing. But really you put Birdman next to Wayne and it just doesn't work. It's a shame Lil Wayne didn't have Olu Dara for a daddy. favorite part is Lil Wayne stopping to eat cornflakes in the middle of spitting a vese.

PAS: The ratio of this was two Wayne verses to one Birdman verse, but it really should have been three to one or four to one. I got the album and it was fine, but Wayne is a guy who puts out 6 mixtapes a year. The Album was sub Carter 2.7. Sub Cart 2.9, Sub Suffix and Sub Prefix. This was a pretty great single though, it is pretty impressive that Cash Money could lose Mannie Fresh as their main producer and still have such great beats. They are like the Walsh 49rs, you lose Montana, plug in Steve Young, Young goes down, Steve Bono or Jeff Kemp takes over.

36. Unk- Walk it Out

PAS: Like alot of the recent Atlanta rap, this is a really great hook and beat with kind of shitty rapper. Those songs really don't get good until they get actual good rappers to do the remix. I am sure the inevitable Lil' Wayne, Jay-Z, Bun B and lets say Rakim remix will be really awesome.

TKG: Really great hook plus a bunch of verses that really should be used as hooks. "it's on once again/Patron once again, I threw my head back then I froze like the wind." that's a hook right there. I mean "Froze Like the Wind" is a tune right there. I love the Lil John style keyboard stuff all over this. and you get the sense that even with all the keyboards this would segue nicely into a sparer Nitty type beat. Yeah the remixes are going to rule.

35. Green Day & U2- The Saints Are Coming

TKG: Is Green day an ex-Ska Punk band? Was that them on the horns? Many of the New Orleans Indians have lost their costumes and supplies. Bono could have put them on tambourine. Ernie K Doe's wife lost the Mother In Law Bar. Bono could have sang one of his tunes and the royalties could have really helped them out. Fats Domino almost died. He could use some royalties. Mia X is stuck trying to raise her children in Texas. Bono and Billy Joe could have covered "Bout it Bout it" and really helped her out. Instead they do this self aggrandizing original New Orleans music pastiche and hoard the royalty checks. Cash money is an army that Bono won't relinquish command of.

PAS: I know alot of people died, and many many more were left homeless, but this song may be the real tragedy of Hurricane Katrina. Damn you Micheal Chertoff.

34. Danity Kane- Show Stopper

TKG: See this is what Diddy should be doing. This is weird expensive expansive sound....which pretty much is a snap beat with the theme from Halloween on loop. Diddy putting Young Joc together with a girl breathely talking about her auto's specs. And this is like a Paul Wall tune where description of car parts isn't a euphemism for something else. This isn't she has a nice trunk and shiny headlights. Nope car specs aren't about sex or anything else. When she says stick the key in the engine and make it purr...she's actually talking about putting a key in the engine and disengaging the parking break. It's about the actual car parts. We're sitting on 22, sitting in big bucket seats just me and you. Its like a Bikini Kill song about empowerment through changing your own tire. Except Bikini Kill actually might have actually use jack as a metaphor for something. No metaphor here. Young Joc is really out of place. Diddy really needed to get Paul Wall or the Tappett borthers. Not actually good, but this is the thing Diddy should be doing.

PAS: I think when Diddy told her to leak brake fluid it might have meant something else, but Diddy isn't really dirty enough to make that work so it might have been literal. The best part of this song was all the timing on the falsetto's "Sitting on twenty toooooos, mink bucket seats me and yooooooo." She also give a shout out to her Escaladies.

33. Lady Sovereign- Love Me or Hate Me

PAS: I clearly don't get British rap. I know that Lady Sovereign is really popular, but I can't get into some girl rapping about her hairy snatch over shitty video game beats. Call it a culture clash.

TKG: Well I really liked Shampoo who I think you can claim were rapping..I mean they weren't singing. and i tend to like arcade beats but the non arcade beats weren't as good as the beats in the Spice Girls "Wannabe". I don't think this is as lyrically interesting. I really thought Princess Superstar might make it as the Feminem. But apparently this fake Heather B has the number 33 song.

32. Pussycat Dolls- Wait a Minute

PAS: I really hate Missy Elliot, I mean an utter visceral shudder runs through me every-time I see her fat face or hear her voice. Outside of that, I pretty much enjoy everything Timbaland does. This was pretty lazy third rate Timbaland, the kind of beat that really belongs as a Magoo album track. If only Aaliyah had taken Royal Caribbean.

TKG: Umm. This is a tune with Nicole Shevardnadze doing the rapping and Timbaland singing the hook? I mean its Timba on the hook..like suddenly he's Pharrell. It is a pretty lazy beat and the song comes across as really derivative. i leave it thinking "Hey didn't Eddy Grant's cousin's neighbor put out something similar". Still I think with enough listens I might learn to like this as much as I like "Walk it Out"

31. Brad Paisley- She's Everything

PAS: She's the lint in my belly button, she's the bookmark in my John LeCarre novel, She's the iceburg lettuce on my turkey sandwich, she's EVEEERRRYYYY THIIIING TOOOO MEEE

TKG: Brad Paisley writes music for women. Songs about what women want to hear. I don't really care for his bland tunesmithing where this really fells like he combined the blandest parts of Jewels "You were meant for me" with the blandest parts of "Like a Rock". I don't care for his guitar solos which are really the most whisting sissy guitar solos. It's so wussy that it almost becomes an interesting effect. Like an anti-Duane Eddy. I imagine Neil Haggerty would copy for a noise rock album and it would almost rule. don't care for his production or his voice. But I have to admire his commitment to writing music for women. I mean this woman sounds absolutely unbearable and yet he's the one he'd lay his life down for. You almost have to admire his craftsmanship to the genre of songs for needy women. Fuck if Omarion covered this tomorrow, Chris Brown would have to retire. " Why are you quitting the". "Well La-La, have you heard Omarion's 'She's Everything'...I mean there's no room for 'I heart Chris Brown' on anyones spiral anymore"

PAS: The last semi-relationship I was in, was with this girl who I hooked up with after a night of relatively deviant sex. Then because I am basically a coward, I ending up dating her for a couple of months, by the end there it was like a weight was pressing on my chest every-time I had to listen to her on the phone, and I started get claustrophobic even if I was on a cell phone outside. I got that same feeling just hearing Brad Paisley describe this clingy harridan he was writing about. "I want a piece of chocolate, take me to a movie, I got nothing left to wear." He wants to spend his life with her, I would jump in front of a bus.

Itunes Top 50 11/18/06 50-41

(We took out clean versions of songs already on the list, so #50 is actually #54, if you wanted to buy this song for some reason)

TKG: Tom Karro-Gassner
PAS: Phil Schneider

50. Stone Sour- Through Glass

TKG: This really sounds like a folk rocker doing a power ballad. Like this guy got tired of opening for Iron and Wine and realized he had a mortgage to pay.

PAS: There are actually a bunch of songs on this list which are basically power ballads, and it is interesting to try to figure out who the band wanted to be before they decided to throw it in and just become Skid Row. Stone Sour clearly wanted to be Songs:Ohia

TKG: For power ballad this feels like it belongs somewhere between REO Speedwagon's " Can't Fight This Feeling"and Boston's "Amanda".

49. Paula De Andra- Walk Away

PAS: Linda Perry completely ruined girl pop. With this basic Casio keyboard beat this could have been a perfectly passable 2001 Vitamin C album track. Now every single teen pop song has to be all maudlin and deep.

TKG: This needed a spoken part where she calls Mos Def to tell him about the jacket he left at her folks Mexican restaurant.

48. The Fray- Over My Head

TKG: Is this the theme song to Spider Man 3? The new Ghost Rider movie?

PAS: Have the Real World Denver spoilers leaked yet? Does the gay Southern Baptist kid attempt suicide? I imagine this is the song that plays while he gets the razor.

47. Gnarls Barkley- Crazy

TKG: This has been around long enough that I can't really write about the song itself and can only write nostalgically about memories of things that happened while listening to it. So I'm in this bar and meet this girl. She told me she was from DC so I asked her what high school she graduated from. When she told me, I asked her what year she graduated thinking I might know one of her classmates. She reluctantly told me that she graduated in 2002. She wanted me to know that people were always surprised about her youth, because she was kind of an old soul. She really liked old things and old music. I was expecting this to mean that she was into hot jazz or something but instead she told me "Like I really should have been alive when Marley was alive" Marley died in the 80s. That's old? Thats like claiming "I'm mature beyond my years because I like the Cars". It was a struggle, as laughing in some ones face normally will prevent you from getting pussy. She played Crazy on the jukebox as she wasn't an old enough "soul" to play "Lovely Day".

PAS: I saw Goodie Mob open for Fishbone and De La Soul in 1995, and they pretty much saved that show (Fishbone was so bad, my buddies girlfriend broke out the Economist mid set.) The highlight of the set was an amazing version of Cell Therapy done with Iron Man as a backing track. It is pretty weird to think that Cee Lo Green did basically two brilliant pieces of music 10 years apart. There were a bunch of bad Goodie Mob and solo albums in between Cell Therapy and Crazy, but if you are going to have a two song resume, those are a pair of songs to have.

46. Diddy featuring Nicole Scherzinger- Come to Me

PAS: Being somewhat ignorant about pop radio, when I saw Diddy did a song with someone name Nicole Scherzinger I figured that he got some Teutonic Opera Singer to sing the hook of his latest exploitative Biggie tribute. This was a lot less interesting then that would have been.

TKG: Bad Boy is all about being all baroque and over the top. Pushing stuff to be so over the top that it's almost tasteless. Should be about Diddy bringing together lots of talent and pushing them to be as over the top as possible with as much over the top production as possible. The production here wasn't especially expansive sounding and this only had one singer and Diddy. Where's the LOX?, Where's Craig Mack? Shouldn't deaf Foxy Brown be making overproduced seal noises? Bail out Shyne, damnit!!!

45. Plain White T's-Hate

TKG: False Advertisement. False advertisement. I was expecting a snap tune. D4L are better lyricists.

PAS: This has a semi-amusing chorus, and appears to use the Mighty Mouse theme as its guitar riff. It still may be the worst non-Fergie tune on this list

44. Taylor Swift- Tim McGraw

PAS: So it has gotten to the point where current shitty modern country artists are doing nostalgia songs about other shitty modern country artists. At least Alan Jackson wanted to be Waylon Jennings.

TKG: Jenny said when she was just five years old, you know there's nothing happenin' at all. Everytime she put on the radio, there was nothing going on at all. One fine morning she put on a Nashville Station and she couldn't believe what she heard. she started crying to that fine-fine music. Ooh her life was saved by Tim McGraw.

43. The All-American Rejects- Move Along

PAS: I saw Death Cab for Cutie play Constitution Hall a couple of weeks back. There was a long section in the middle of the show, where they did all of their pre O.C. indy stuff, which is all fine, but has no hooks. So you had a crowd of earnest 19 year olds wanting to sing along, but no hooks to sing. The All-American Rejects are a really sub par Death Cab for Cutie, but they at least write some hooks.

TKG: Is this the first pop tune with a Bo Diddley beat since George Michael's Faith? The opening drumming part also has a real cool hollowed out almost Adam and The Ants/Bow Wow Wow type production to it. I kind of like this tune . Good nostalgia for senior year song. I imagine fifteen years from now guys who graduated from high school in 2007 will listen to this and go "those were the days...Man. Frank, that car, that bridge" and then start crying.

42. Keith Urban- Once In a Lifetime

PAS: This song opens up with a Postal Serviceish spare electronic drum beat, and closes with a weird start and stop Q and not U guitar, and pretty much everything in the middle was standard pop country. I think we may have accidentally downloaded the Diplo remix of the original. Not actually a good song, but even stranger then any of the Timberland stuff on this list.

TKG: Is all Keith Urban this weird? The quiet quiet loud Dischord section segues into Mandolins and what the fuck. Feels like some sort of producers joke. I mean a country star with last name Urban. is this for real. I mean I guess there was an R&B hearthrob whose last name was Sweat. But...He's supposedly a New Zealander and I tend to like C&W from Oceania. The Koori country stuff with Aborigine's playing country rules. And a lot of country down under still has yodeling. This tune ends with Urban doing a little yodel. I kind of want to hear more Urban. For guys from Down Under doing fake country this may be weirder than anything Nick Cave has done.

41. Ciara- Promise

PAS: This was really dull, I have heard some Ciara before and usually her singles at least have a semi-interesting Jazzy Pha beat, but this was just boring. Who is still using Roger Troutman voice box stuff as innovative production in 2006? If you are going to jack Zapp, it shouldn't be this forgettable.

TKG: I didn't know there was non-Jazzy Pha Ciara. I mean I assume he wasn't involved with this as there wasn't two minutes of him telling me that he was there. I normally like Ciara but this did nothing for me and her attempts at falsetto didn't accomplish anything. I mean you go to falsetto it should be for some emotional payoff or something. And the spoken parts never felt confessional the way spoken parts should. This really felt like it was written for Tamia. Maybe she could have done something more with it.